ad hoc.

Why did I watch The Last Kiss? Maybe it was morbid curiosity, just like when I forced myself to watch Elizabethtown. Also, it’s a movie about the trials and tribs of turning 30, so maybe I thought there was tiny sliver of truth I could relate to. What the fuck was I thinking? This was boring shmoring, Zach Braff whining and plotzing through the movie, dealing with his girl troubles and kee-crazy friends. The characters had no depth, no personalities, and it was a wonder any of them had relationships. The one thing that freaked me out was that his friend was played by the same actor who played the crack addice who kidnapped and tortured David on Six Feet Under. No one should ever allow him to make other movies ever!

But still. Please. I always wonder when movies like this are filmed, doesn’t somebody say something? Like the gaffer or someone in catering let someone know what they are filming is awful?

Although when I originally saw it, I wasn’t pleased with the second season of Wonder Showzen. I just watched it on dvd and realized it is still good. I guess when you wait a whole week and get the whole show about “Horse Apples” and then a whole half hour of Chauncey asking people to make compelling tv (funny ideas for one skit, not 30 minutes). This stuff is more funny when you watch several episodes in a row. I hated the whole episode that happened during the segregatand the whole “bootlegged” show. But there were some gems- the Winorobot, and Trevor at the beauty pageant. I could go on and on. I’ve also noticed that the comedy world is incredibly incestuous and all appear on each other’s shows- like this, Arrested Devo, Reno 911, UCB.

So, in honor, here are some choice Wonder Showzen clips, from both seson one and two. Also, it’s not meant for anyone who doesn’t appreciate satire on racism.

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SACHA BARON COHEN - COHEN’S SINGING DUMPED FROM SWEENEY TODD

British funnyman SACHA BARON COHEN’s singing has reportedly been cut from TIM BURTON’s forthcoming SWEENEY TODD movie, because it’s so bad. The BORAT and ALI G creator plays SIGNOR ADOLFO PIRELLI - the arch-rival of JOHNNY DEPP’s SWEENEY TODD, The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street - in the big screen version of the hit musical. British newspaper The Sun reports Burton has given Cohen permission to rap his songs, because his singing voice isn’t good enough. A film insider says, “Pirelli is a notoriously demanding role with some difficult songs. “Any professional singer would struggle. So Sacha has been told to go for a rap style. It will be a bit like JIM BROADBENT’s performance in MOULIN ROUGE!. That won him a BAFTA. “Sacha is going to do a fantastic job but he couldn’t cut it with the singing. His voice was too low.”

This is some bullshit. I was already weary of the Tim Burton-remake of the musical. Sweeney Todd is very near and dear to my heart, and when you fuck with it, I take it personally. Uh, his part is that of an opera singer- and now you take away the singing? Second of all, the numbers with Pirelli are some of the best of the show. If he can’t sing it- fine someone who can! Borat already finished his fifteen minutes, stop trying to capitalize on that. Ugh.

James Purefoy on Gay Sex: Never Say Never: Okay, I won’t.

Most Dangerous Toys Ever

How Did I End Up On The Cover Of This Romance Novel?

Why Jay-Z should be president: I’m convinced. Little known fact about me: I am fascinated/have a small celeb crush on Jay-Z. I can’t explain it right now, I am still trying to figure it out.

Psychology of Gift Giving: for all you gentiles.

I’m a little bit addicted to year end music lists. As if you couldn’t tell. If I see Joanna Newsome on one more list, I will scream.

Pitchfork Feature: Guest List: Best of 2006

stereogum: <i>Rolling Stone</i>’s Best Albums Of ‘06:

Rolling Stone : The 100 Best Songs of 2006

Pitchfork Feature: Top 25 Worst Album Covers of 2006:I agree:

Jesus Camp, the documentary, is posted on Google video. Noyce!

I sooooo need to see the show Spring Awakening. Who would have known Duncan Sheik is still around?

Also, I sooooooo need to see Children of Men. Of course it’s not playing around here.

Seriously, the Jackass movies and series are completely misunderstood. I have to give thanks to Alli who so many years ago opened my eyes to its subtle genius. Jackass Number Two is no exception, which I just watched. I can’t explain the appeal of it. It certainly is not the huge amount of bodily fluids that are secreted throughout, or even the stunts themselves. The movie might as well be called “things I can put my scrotum on”. I think the fun thing about it is that after all the yeara of doing it, they all still have an amazing and hilarious time. Not to mention my insane crushes on Chris Pontius (and Dave Englund, Jeff Tremaine and Ryan Dunn). I’m waiting for th third move where their major stunt is to all make out with each other.

Seriously, the shows are probably the gayest things ever. The guys will never pass up a chance to be naked in front of each other or to touch each other’s genitals. I’m okay with that.

I don’t know why I have been into electronic music lately. This is an album that is actually coming out in March, by the group !!! (Don’t ask me how to pronounce it). It’s quite good.

[!!!; MYTH TAKES]

I’ve spent time doing one of my mind-numbing activities- organizing the movies I own. The total calue of them is over $10,000 apparently. Well, that doesn’t cover the bail after I go to prison for the immense mount of bootlegged movies I own.

Remember, all songs are uploaded here. Check out part one, part two, part three, and part four.

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Remember, all songs are uploaded here. Check out part one, part two, and part three.

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continues today with She’s Out of Control. Who in the holy hell greenlighted this movie? And were teenagers/high school really like that? But, there is nothing better than makeovers and makeover montages, and this is basically a movie full of them. I truly believe this movie alone gave me eating disorders and major self-loathing issues. I was OBSESSED with the girl’s wardrobe in the movie. Although she looked like a whore through the whole thing. This was a time when wearing thigh high lace stockings with miniskirts was the height of coutoure. I used to try to recreate the clothes on my Barbies.

[The Jealous Sound; Kill Them With Kindness]

I just watched the documentary The Aristocrats. Hmmm, not much to say about it. Not for the prude or humorless. Hilarious? A little bit. The joke itself is not hilarious, and the obscenity is not hilarious, it’s all in the delivery and appreciation. I kind of want to have an Aristocrats-improv party.

Remember, all songs are uploaded here. Check out part one and part two.

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Hey guys it’s a new picture from the Order of the Phoenix movie. Looks badass. I am assuming that this is Dumbledore’s army. Check out the wizard hipster on the far left. What’s his patronus? $100 vintage jeans? Luna looks good. Ron has a cute haircut.

Which leads me to the question: what would be in your room of requirements? Mine would have veggie corn dogs, old copies of Teen Beat, a Ewan McGregor cardboard cut-out, and a ECT machine.

Also: Danny Radcliffe is a chosen person!

Somewhere, some morally bankrupt MTV executive answered my prayers. The Hills will be back for another season. Will LC and Jason be together? Will Heidi be able to hold down a job? I can barely sleep. Except that I can.

I hope this show sparks an apocalyptic race riot.

I like to attend them in pro-choice gear while spinning my dreidel.

I’m back to making dolls again, this time on Meez. I’ll make more soon. I’m a little creeped out. Also, I’m not a size -4.

Remember, all songs are uploaded here. Check out part one.

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Now that I’ve finished my album of the year list, I’m turning to singles of the year. Now, I don’t usually pay attention to top 40 radio, so I don’t know if all of these have officially been released, but these are songs that somehow came out this year, either officially or on an album that came out. I’m being a little more loose on these, because it includes a lot of popular singles which have merit themselves, while their album and artists may be lacking in talent or credibility.

You can find them all uploaded here.

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Kids with High IQs grow up to be vegetarians.

For a few seconds I am going to ignore the fact that it’s probably not a direct correlation.

Ok, since it is 2 weeks until the year is over, I’ve finalized my year-end list of albums. There is no way in hell I can put them in order individually, so I put them in tiers. I’ve reuploaded the top tier here so you can make sure you listen to them. They are in no particular order.

I’d like to note the particular artists that are absent: Arctic Monkeys, Keane (sorry Andrew), The Knife, TV on the Radio, Mxpx, the Decemberists, Tapes ‘N Tapes, Hot Chip, The Hold Steady.

The Sounds; Dying to Say This to You. [Here]. Eighties new-wave, keyboards and male/female vocals. Some of the best melodies ever. And who would have guessed it from a band from Sweden? This band often gets lumped into the “The” bands category, but is way better. I actually first head this in October 2005, and it by far surpassed anything since then.

Shiny Toy Guns; We Are Pilots. [here] Surprisingly, another throwback to the eighties new-wave electronic pop music. Listen to “Rainy Monday” and tell me you don’t like it, I’ll pay you a million dollars. This album makes me feel like I am a club kid hanging out with James St. James.

The Thermals; The Body, the Blood, the Machine. [here] I somehow always forget momentarily that the Thermals are one of my favorite bands. Actually, Fuckin’ A was also my favorite album of 2004. This album pretty much sounds the same- if it’s not broken, why fix it? Grungy. loud, fast tempo. Perfection.

Muse; Black Holes and Revelations. [here] I have talked about this one enough, I am not sure what else to say. It’s a fucking rock opera staduim album.

The Rapture; Pieces of the People We Love. [link coming soon] Best beats and dance funk, using nothing but guitars and drums.

The Veils; Nux Vomica. [here]They’re from New Zealand. They’re awesome. I don’t know much more. This is like the soundtrack to an amazing suicide note.

Also, check out last year’s list. Silent Alarm would still be high on my list.

Hi all, I’ve updated and moved the site of my music collection.

http://thebluealbum.wordpress.com/ 

Growing every minute.

Showtime has a new series coming out about Henry VII called The Tudors. Historical settings? Lavish costumes? Beautiful people? I’m so there.

Silly me, I thought Henry VIII looked like this…

but I was wrong. He looked like Jonathan Rhys Meyers.