you can’t stop the beat

Thanksgiving weekend: the time when lots of Americans go out and exercise mass consumerism. This year I actually managed to buy nothing this weekend (except more cat food and toilet paper. So sue me.) This is a weekend where I consume mass amounts of pop culture.

Watched Hairspray on dvd. I was actually dreading it, because I had really low expectations. As far as broadway musical to movie adapatations, I had both Rent and The Producers on my mind. However, I was pleasnatly surprised. Nikki Blonsky was fantastic, unfortunately this is probably the only role she is ever going to get. Amanda Bynes, when given the right role, is actually quite hilarious. The adult cast, except for James Marsden, was pretty sub-par. And John Travolta was absolutely horrendous. First, he looked hella scary, and what the fuck was with the accent he put on? Was he trying to do a Baltimore accent? Zac Efron was actually quite adorable too, and I am not saying that because he is Zac Efron. I think he could even try his hand on Broadway, his dancing is pretty good. Here are my complaints: of course the movie couldn’t include every musical number from the show, but they left out the best ones! “Mama I’m a big girl now” could have showcased more of Penny and Amber, who now seemed like peripheral characters. “The Big Dollhouse” is one of my favorite numbers too, but they actually changed the plot to where Tracey does not go to jail. Link’s “It Takes Two” was on the soundtrack but not in the movie. Or did I maybe miss it? It could have been a huge Zefron moment. The movie also suffered from what the musical did: the first two thirds of the movie were great, and then the last third really lagged. If I had to put my thoughts to a mathematical formula,

John Waters’ original movie version > the Broadway stage version > the 2007 movie

Also finished Heroes, and I know I am going to disappoint a lot of you by saying this, but somehow it just didn’t do it for me. I really thrive on character development, and the only character I really felt I saw develop was Sylar (and I am not just saying that because I lurve Zachary Quinto). I felt like the whole season unraveled into a web of significant plot twists, and every five seconds we learn that a character is not what they seem. Dun dun dunnnn….Mr. Bennett is not trying to kill the Heroes, he’s really protecting them…dun dun dunnnn…Nathan is really Claire’s father…dun dun dunnnn…Nathan and mom are really behind the NYC explosion….it was fun to figure out, but didn’t suck me into the lives of everyone. And quite frankly, I am getting really sick of Milo Ventimiglia’s bangs. I am glad he cuts his hair in season 2. And as I have said a million times before, Heroes is a total ripoff of The 4400, who was able to keep the story going with character development.

I also watched The Girl Next Door, which, believe it or not, is a pretty kickass movie. I think it was marketed as a teen sex romp, but really it is not. Really awesome use of a soundtrack as well. And, as mentioned, Enchanted and BSG: Razor. Also got a crapload of music, but really haven’t had a chance to listen to it.

Enchanted

Against my better judgement I saw Enchanted. Oh hell, who am I fooling, I intiated the whole outting. I needed something totally mindless and entertaining. Although I swore off Disney movies forever, I figured a Disney movie that makes fun of Disney movies would be good. They really did have a go at themselves, and the beginning animated sequence included every cliche in Disney movies. I am not sure if the kiddies will get the sardonic respresentation, but oh well. However, in true Disney fascism, they are equal opportunity offenders, where they showed stereotypes of “supposed” Middle Eastern cab drivers, angry black women, horny gay men, and practically crucifed the chipmonk. The whole love story thing made me cynical too- how did they really end up together? Does she even use the bathroom? How do they explain their relationship to people? And I don’t think that was part of the irony. Also, I am over Patrick Dempsey at the heartthrob. I was kind of on the bandwagon when he made his comeback, but I’m over it. I think they should totally re-release Loverboy.

But James Marsden, be still my heart, totally played the dumb prince to perfection. Check out the tights! My obsession with him is growing. I also saw Hairspray this weekend and passed a couple of Gap ads with him in it as well. His bone structure can solve world peace.

Planet awesome

Planet Terror came out today (or last week I think) and a reminder to SEE IT NOW. It is one of my favorite zombie movies, along with 28 Weeks Later and Dawn of the Dead. The ficticious trailers are also in this one.

Also, Robert Rodriguez and Rose McGowan are now engaged, which makes them possibly the most awesome fucking couple on the planet.

I wish all of Rome had one neck

I watched Caligula this weekend. After discussing my obsession with ancient Rome, a friend told me to NEVER see this movie. And, of course, I went out and got it right away. This was one trippy mess. It was like it took place at the Caesar’s palace in Atlantic City. Throw in some unnecessary porn and the worst.acting.ever. And why did Malcolm McDowell always look as if he was wearing a figure skating costume? You can see the embarassment of everyone involved. In fact, Gore Vidal was all fuck off, I don’t want to be attached to this anymore. A few years back, an filmmaker made a fake trailer for a remake which is pretty awesome. For a while people thought is was coming out…and how I wish it was. Heads up for Benicio del Toro looking mighty fine.

Not safe for work (fortunately).

The Doom Generation

I pretty much have been meaning to see The Doom Generation since it came out in 1995. Finally was able to watch it, and it was totally not what I was expecting. In fact, I’m not sure what I was expecting. I always wonder how projects like this get greenlighted. Obviously, it was not a major studio but it’s great that some producer out there has a heart for subversive ideas. Also, wtf is with the comment “A savagely funny film” being the lead quote on the ads, I guess it was funny in a dark way, not funny ha ha. I guess whatever sells. Anyone have a rec for which other Gregg Araki films I should watch? I am already planning on watching Mysterious Skin.

Factory snore

So after waiting maybe a year or more, I finally sat down and watched Factory Girl. God, how dreadful. I’d prefer it to be about Andy Warhol because he is a pretty fucked up guy. In this movie he played the quirky gay sidekick. And really, who the fuck cares about Edie Sedgwick? She is really annoying and didn’t do much but look pretty. But uh. mah. gawd. Hayden Christiansen is beyond hot as the Bob Dylan character. Like, it was kind of unbelievable. It almost made up for the dreadful dialogue and acting.

must do: See Death Proof

So today, Death Proof, one half of the Grind House movie, is out on dvd, and barely anyone saw it in theaters. I am telling you that this movie gives me the freaking chills it is so genius. I think that some people will actually hate it and not appreciate it. The plot is nonexistent and for about an hour and ten minutes, there is just banter amongst the actresses that don’t have anything to do with the plot. But the homage to bad grindhouse movies is striking as well as the camera work. And Kurt Russell’s best movie yet. And probably the best soundtrack to a movie ever.