watch out

To John Mayer’s people: watch out, you have a potential obsessive fan. To think, when I lived in Manhattan, I would pass his condo every damn day and I didn’t care (He lived on 2nd Ave and 14th Street then, he may not anymore). Well, although all the pictures of him and Jessawhore Slutson (I’m so creative) surfaced, this news was promising.

At Nobu in Miami in Tuesday night, the pair “barely spoke” to each other, reports Page Six, and John “was extremely quiet and didn’t speak a lot.” Jessica, as is her wont, engaged in “a lot of puppy-dog looks and twirled and twisted her hair.” Sure, they were seen holding hands, but Simpson then left John all alone for 20 minutes at the table to get herself primped for cameras waiting outside.

I mean, how much is there left to say about lip gloss, Daddy, and boobs?

As usual, John is being extremely witty on his blog.

10. You turn 30 in October. What will be the worst part about seeing your 20s go away?

There are lots of very invasive tests that doctors like to administer to men in their thirties. These tests usually result in a ride home with the radio off and very little blinking.

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