If you don’t mind allowing me to continue my hate…
Why? Laughing like an idiot and wiggling ass does not make a career.
Why: smiling til your face falls off does not make a star. Plus, your foray into dumb chick flicks does not make you accomplished. The second you sat down to pee with a big Russian fur hat on in Almost Famous made me loathe you. In fact, I would have traded you for some beers in a poker game in a second. Plus, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days made me rip out my uterus and stomp on it. Plus, Owen Wilson over Chris Robinson? Wtf?
Why: Ahhhhh, the one I love to hate the most. This gal is so overrated it kills me. Firstly, she has this way of acting by gritting her teeth and talking without moving her mouth. Don’t believe me? Watch the Phantom Menace. Finally, Garden State is the root of all evils. If I were Zach Braff, the second I met her I’d want to punch her in the face, not fall in love. And no, no matter how many Oscar nominations it got, I am not convinced that you are a stripper that can snag Clive Owen. HATE!
There are also some former objects of my hate that have since convinced me otherwise. So Natalie, there is still hope for us.
Kirsten Dunst: I hated her forever (in the Bring It On Days) but Marie Antoinette made me love her! Good work Kiki!
Keira Knightley: Pirates annoyed the shit out of me, but Pride & Prejudice was fantastic.